Baby Boy

Monday 25 November 2013

I’m looking at a blank page and thinking of how to record one of those moments in life that is significant in every way.  A week ago today our little Daniel Oden Cornish, was born. Our lives will never be the same. 

This pregnancy has been challenging… perhaps they always are.  Nausea and exhaustion where rough and my emotions seemed to be more up and down this time.  The last six or so weeks I was especially uncomfortable.  It was uncomfortable to sit, it hurt to bend, I couldn’t lay down for more than a few minutes, it was hard to clean to cook to drive to eat.  We also were having a hard time figuring out a middle name.  Matt kept trying to make suggestions, but we just couldn’t agree on anything.  Basically, I was kind of being difficult, although unintentionally.  It was frustrating.  I was very ready to have our Cowboy out of my tummy and into our arms.  Anyway, I’m getting ahead of myself.

At our week 38 visit (November 4) Dr. Judd checked to see if was progressing at all.  I’d had a lot of hip and pelvis pain that I hoped meant I was making some progress.  All that discomfort had to have some value, right?!  And although I hadn’t really had any contractions I thought this time might be different since I’d already had a baby.  Just to be safe, for the two weeks previous to that week 38 appointment I kept telling myself to have no expectation that I was inducible.  I told myself that over and over… but it didn’t work.  When Dr. Judd said nothing was happening and that I’d probably go a week over again, I was quite disappointed.  Sigh.  Quite disappointed.  Another week seemed like another year. 

By the time we got to the week 39 appointment (November 11) I was better prepared for, though not excited about, the prospect of being at the same place I had been the week before.  Sure enough, nothing had changed.   The only thing different about this appointment was when Dr. Judd said that we’d be getting a non-stress test once we were officially overdue, which would be the following Monday, November 18 (since my due date was Sunday, November 17).  He also mentioned that the week before a big holiday there was always an increase of failed non-stress tests.  The techs apparently have a little more wiggle room on interpreting the results of the non-stress tests than a doctor has in deciding if a woman is inducible or not.  I guess they want to cut down on the number of women who have to come in for the non-stress tests, so they fail more of them so they don’t have as many to do when the holiday comes. 

On Monday, November 18 we had our week 40 visit.  I was technically 40 weeks and 1 day.  That’s 1 day overdue.  We knew we would be getting the non-stress test that day because they are only done on Mondays and Thursdays.  While we waited to see Dr. Judd, Matt suggested that we have them call over to Utah Valley Hospital and schedule our test.  A few minutes later the nurse came and told us that there was only one spot open for the day and it was in about 45 minutes.  So they were going to hurry and get us through our doctor’s appointment so we could make it to UVRMC.   Dr. Judd said, again, that nothing had changed.  If we passed our non-stress test then we’d go again on Thursday.  He again mentioned the increase of failures and said the techs sounded like they were in a “failing mood.” 

So off we went to UVRMC.  We got strapped into the monitors and the nurse checked our little Cowboy’s heart rate.  It sounded good.  That was happy.  We don’t want to fail that portion.  Then she started measuring the amniotic fluid levels.  The nurse was training another so she did a lot of talking out loud to explain things.  She would find a little fluid here but say “It’s not very much so we won’t count that.”  After a few other comments similar to that, Matt patted my arm and mouthed, “She’s trying to fail you.”  I still had no expectation of failing today.  I thought they would have us come back on Thursday and then maybe we’d fail.  After about ten minutes the nurses left for a few minutes for the doctor to check out the results.  After a few minutes she and came back with congratulations… we’d failed!  I was quite shocked.  Really?!?!  We were both thrilled, but it was hard to wrap my mind around.  Our Cowboy was coming! 

We called mom and dad and the rest of the family as we drove home to get the hospital bags.  I’d mostly packed them a week or so earlier, but had a few last minute things to gather up.  I held Kate as we were were about to leave and thought about how everything was going to change.  Everything was going to be different.  I was excited and nervous. I felt like I was holding my breath as we packed things into the car and headed to Orem Community Hospital.  We checked in at about 12:30.  There was only one other woman in labor at the time.  They asked if we had a room preference so we asked if room 115 was open.  That was where Kate was delivered.  It was available, so we headed down the hall, hand in hand, to have a baby.

At 1:30pm our nurse, Shannon, placed the cervidil and Matt and I settled in for what we thought would be a good, long wait.  With Kate the cervidil had done basically nothing after twelve hours.  We turned on Netflix and decided to watch some “Doctor Who.”  Neither of us had seen any episodes but we’d heard about it a lot recently.  Shannon asked after a bit if I was having any contractions.  I said no and asked if I was supposed to.  I hadn’t had any with Kate.  She said sometimes cervidil can put women into labor.  After about two or three hours I was tired of sitting in the bed, my tailbone hurt from the angle I was sitting.  Well, at least that’s what I thought.  As soon as I stood up I realized it wasn’t my tailbone but a lot of pressure in my lower back.  It was quite strong when I stood up.  Shannon suggested she check my progress just in case something was happening.  I was dilated to a 3 and about 60% effaced.  WHAT?!?!  Whoo-hoo!!!  They brought in a yoga ball for me to sit on.  That helped so much, I'm not sure why it helped but I didn't care why.  I was just grateful that it did. 

Another few hours passed and the pressure increased until it was really painful.  I got an epidural at about 7:30pm.  It took effect quickly and I was able to relax for a bit.  Matt asked if I wanted a blessing.  I had planned to ask for one and was so very grateful he was willing and worthy to give it.  I prayed first and felt specifically that our little one, our Daniel, would have a special relationship with his siblings.  Then Matt put his hands on my head and gave me a beautiful blessing.  He said the baby would be safe through the delivery and I would be comfortable.  He also said, “Our warrior has been prepared and is ready and excited to come to our family,” and that “Heavenly Father is specifically aware of this moment in our lives.”  It was such a sweet experience to be there with Matt and feel the Spirit and power of the Father during this experience.

They checked again and I was still progressing.  They called Dr. Judd to update him and he said to remove the cervidil and to wait until morning to begin the Pitocin.  I don’t think he wanted a middle-night delivery if he could help it.  At about 9:30 we both tried to get some sleep.  Matt made up the couch bed and pulled it over next to my bed.  We held hands as we tried to get some sleep.  My contraction continued and when the nurse checked again about an hour later she said we were going to be having a baby before the day was done.  By 10:30 I could feel the contractions again.  The anesthesiologist was called back in and he asked if I was feeling pressure or pain.  When I told him I felt pressure, he said the epidural wasn’t really going to help with that. The nurse then said we were well on our way and, "You're going to have a baby tonight."  She was right.  He was ready to come:)

Matt began coaching me through contractions.  I was nervous and yet felt an inner calm at the same time.  It was a great comfort to have Matt so close.  Dr. Judd was called and arrived at about 11pm.  Everything was prepped for him, Matt was on my right and Kylie the nurse on my left.  At 11:24pm I was told to begin pushing.  It hurt.  The epidural had worn off.  Dr. Judd said not to be afraid of the pain (easy for him to say).  Matt said he knew I could do this.  I’d asked for a mirror this time and Matt told me when some hair was visible.  As soon as I looked tears started to well up.  He was coming.  Our little one was coming.  I cried and pushed for only a few more minutes before he was delivered at 11:28pm.  I was able to touch his leg and foot as Dr. Judd held him up.  And then his first cry brought more tears.  He was here.  He was safe.  What an almost unbelievable reality that moment was… the moment our son was born.

His chubby cheeks were a bit deceptive as everyone started making guesses about his weight.  Most thought he’d be in the 9½ pound range, but he was 8 pounds 5 ounces and 20 inches long.  I watched as they cleaned him off, Matt standing close by.  Daniel cried a little more, his arms and legs flailing.  They brought him to me and I laid him on my chest.  He was immediately calm and snuggled in.  The sweetest joy filled my soul.  The love I felt for him seemed to have always existed.  
 

After a few minutes I handed Daniel to Matt, who sat in a rocking chair next to my bed.  Daniel was calm, his eyes open and looking around.  That’s just what Tyler had done when he was born.  What a wonderful sight, a Daddy and his son.  We talked about the middle name again and it was decided that he would be Daniel Oden Cornish. He's named after some remarkable men, some I've never met, others are some of the best I've ever known.

We sent a text to the kids (we would have called, but it was late), called mom and dad, and sent an email to Matt’s family.  What a joy it is to have family to share these moments with.  Matt went with Daniel to the nursery for his bath while I ate some cereal and pudding.  It's funny to sit there and think, "I just gave birth to a baby.  He was inside of me!  And now he's here, healthy and safe.  A new soul is beginning his mortal experience.  This is big!!"  

We were all pretty exhausted and it was getting late.  It was around 1:30am by the time we were all settling down.  Daniel has been quite the squeaker, even from that very first night.  I wasn’t able to really fall asleep.  How could I?  We had a new little soul with us.  I listened as he breathed and cried as I thought about the miracle of his creation.  He was safe and healthy and long awaited for and finally here.  After a while Matt put Daniel next to him, up by his head, which calmed Daniel almost immediately.  

With that Daniel’s squeaks quieted, soon both were asleep.  I watched these two boys sleep, cried again, and prayed a prayer of gratitude.  Even now, as I look at Daniel asleep on a pillow next to me, I almost can’t believe it.  He is really here.  There is a sacred feeling that comes when holding a new little one.  Holding Daniel is holding a piece of heaven.